Why You Should Not Send Your Child to Preschool: A Teacher Explains

Updated on March 25, 2018
letstalkabouteduc profile image

I'm a credentialed teacher with a master's degree in special education. I spent many years teaching preschool and kindergarten.

Preschool Is No Longer Seen as Separate and Special

Our vision of an ideal preschool—children painting at easels, playing dress up, riding tricycles, and digging for dinosaur fossils in a sandbox—is slowly fading away. The government, convinced it knows how to do early education best, has seized control—causing experienced teachers to step away in disgust. The precious preschool experience—once sacrosanct— is becoming nothing more than the starting point in the long educational procession that includes too much standardized testing, rote learning, and technology and too little play, exploration, creativity, and hands-on learning. The humanity in early childhood education is disappearing as the bureaucracy grows. Unfortunately, in today's educational climate, it's far too easy to list 5 reasons for NOT sending your youngster to preschool.

Experts in early childhood education get silenced while politicians get louder. More government influence in education makes preschoolers subject to experimentation, not time-tested practices that have been proven successful.
Experts in early childhood education get silenced while politicians get louder. More government influence in education makes preschoolers subject to experimentation, not time-tested practices that have been proven successful. | Source

1. Decades of Research in Early Childhood Education Fall to the Wayside as the Government Demands Rigorous Instruction

In addition to being the mother of actor, Matt Damon, Nancy Carlsson-Paige is a professor of education, author, and public speaker who characterizes our current situation as a “dark time” for learning. Like so many of her esteemed colleagues, Professor Carlsson-Paige feels compelled to speak out against standardized testing, rote learning, and so-called academic rigor (practices once reserved for older students) as they're now being thrust upon our youngest learners. While recently accepting an award, Professor Carlsson-Paige spoke about the sad state of affairs in early childhood education:

I have loved my life's work...So never in my wildest dreams could I have foreseen the situation we find ourselves in today. Where education policies that do not reflect what we know about how young children learn could be mandated and followed. We have decades of research in child development and neuroscience that tell us that young children learn actively – they have to move, use their senses, get their hands on things, interact with other kids and teachers, create, invent. But in this twisted time, young children starting public Pre-K at the age of four are expected to learn through 'rigorous instruction.'”

Highly Recommend This Book for Parents Who Are Thinking About Preschool

Taking Back Childhood: A Proven Roadmap for Raising Confident, Creative, Compassionate Kids
Taking Back Childhood: A Proven Roadmap for Raising Confident, Creative, Compassionate Kids

If you want to know what we're doing wrong in early childhood education today, this is the book to read. Nancy Carlsson-Paige is an outstanding advocate for young kids and is knowledgeable about how they learn best: imaginative play, exploration, hands-on materials, and a child-centered environment. I highly recommend parents read this book before deciding on preschool or homeschooling.

 

2. Scholars in Early Childhood Education Have Formed a Coalition to Protest the Federal Government's Policies

Nancy Carlsson-Paige is not alone in criticizing the federal government's policies. Recognizing this crisis in early education, experts in the field have formed a coalition called Defending the Early Years. Their goal is to advocate for practices proven beneficial to young children—experiences that promote creativity, thinking, and problem solving.

Sadly, the federal government largely ignores these experts and lets bureaucrats—most of whom have never taught anything to anyone—set educational policy. Bureaucrats—with their extremely limited knowledge and experience—reduce early childhood education to one simple question: How can we get these munchkins to learn more and more at earlier and earlier ages? The Swiss psychologist, Jean Piaget, renown for studying the cognitive stages of childhood, saw this obsession with speeding up learning as uniquely American. Unlike other countries that honor children's developmental stages, America stands alone in wanting to dismiss them.

When you teach a child something you take away forever his chance of discovering it for himself.

— Jean Piaget
What the U.S. does in early childhood education today goes against the research. Other countries celebrate a child's need for discovery, but we don't.
What the U.S. does in early childhood education today goes against the research. Other countries celebrate a child's need for discovery, but we don't. | Source

3. Escalated Learning Is Harmful to Children

America's preoccupation with speeding up learning has resulted in an escalated curriculum, meaning activities once reserved for older students are now used with younger ones—reading groups, structured lessons, standardized testing and, of course, the newly adopted Common Core. The overall development of a youngster —emotional, social, and physical—gets overlooked in favor of an absurdly long checklist of discrete skills— count to 10, identify numbers, duplicate a pattern, recognize letters, and so on and so on. The art of teaching becomes a thing of the past, swallowed up by an endless series of assessments and documentations. In the process, the scope of teaching and learning becomes ridiculously narrow. The most gifted teachers become bored and frustrated, leave the profession, and get replaced by those who don't know any better or simply don't care.

There is no research that supports an escalated curriculum. In fact, children who learn to read at age 5 don't do any better in the long run than those who learn at 6 or 7. Yet, it has been documented that those children taught to read at an early age are less likely to read for pleasure as they get older than their peers who learned to read later.

The negative effects of an escalated curriculum, however, have been documented: increased stress levels, higher incidences of aggressive behavior, acting out, and a particularly disturbing phenomenon, the expulsion of little children from preschool. An escalated curriculum asks young children to behave in ways that are unreasonable at their tender ages. When they're unable to do so—getting frustrated, acting defiant, refusing to participant—they're labeled troublemakers, hyperactive, and socially immature. In fact, three and four-year olds in state-financed preschools are expelled at three times the national rate for K-12 students (boys much more so than girls, blacks more so than whites). Instead of asking: What's wrong with these little kids? The proper question to pose is: What's wrong with the preschool environment? Lilian G. Katz, Professor Emeritus at the University of Illinois writes:

"While early formal instruction may appear to show good test results at first, in the long term, in follow-up studies, such children have had no advantage. On the contrary, especially in the case of boys, subjection to early formal instruction increases their tendency to distance themselves from the goals of schools, and to drop out of it, either mentally or physically."

Finland respects its teachers as true professionals. In the US, we're taken away their autonomy and creativity—leaving them with assessments and documentation.
Finland respects its teachers as true professionals. In the US, we're taken away their autonomy and creativity—leaving them with assessments and documentation. | Source

4. Instead of Learning from Finland's Success in Early Childhood Education, the U.S. Is Doing the Opposite

Finland is known across the globe for its outstanding educational system. Other countries travel there to study and duplicate their success. Unfortunately, the United States has learned nothing from Finland when it comes to early childhood education. Instead, we stubbornly insist on doing the opposite:

  • Finland is a small nation (the size of Minnesota) where teachers are revered as competent professionals who've earned respect and autonomy. They have an unusual amount of control over the curriculum (they may even choose their own textbooks) and how they run their classrooms. The United States, on the other hand, has established a massive bureaucracy called Common Core that strips power from teachers in the name of nation-wide uniformity.
  • Children in Finland don't receive formal instruction until 7. Conversely, the United States now gives structured lessons and assessments to 4 and 5-year-olds.
  • Teachers are esteemed in Finland but not in the US. Educators here have low status and low pay. They face ever-increasing responsibilities, the burden of excessive standardized testing, little or no support from administrators, disrespectful students, and uninvolved parents.
  • Eeva Penttila, head of international relations for Helsinki's educational department, says this about Finland's early education: "The focus...is to 'learn how to learn.' Instead of formal instruction in reading and math, there are lessons on nature, animals, and the 'circle of life' and a focus on materials-based learning." The US, sadly, has taken the exact opposite approach with Common Core, focusing on teaching narrow skills rather than developing the whole child—body, mind, and spirit.

5. Preschools Are Now Doing More Harm Than Good

Unfortunately, the US can no longer guarantee the bare minimum in early childhood education: Do no harm! Preschools are now doing lots of things that hurt children's love of learning, squash their innate desire to explore and play, and stunt their budding creativity. When experienced teachers walk away and inexperienced teachers take their places, little kids are stuck—the unwitting victims of an educational bureaucracy based on politics, not sound practices. There's no doubt children in poor socio-economic circumstances are hurt more profoundly by our country's obsession with academic rigor than those in wealthier areas. Nancy Carlsson- Paige writes:

"Sadly, the worst of the restrictive, standardized, drill-based education is happening in our poorest communities. More often the teachers in these underfunded schools have less training. They are more dependent on the standardized tests and scripted curricula and more willing to impose them. These teachers haven’t learned what they could do instead of the drills and tests, and they haven’t learned how harmful these approaches are for kids.

"I wish you could see the faces of kids in the low-income communities I visited this year. They are scared, sad and alienated. I see on them an expression that says, 'School is not fun, and it is not for me. I want out of here.'"

Final Thoughts

Sadly, it has become too easy to list 5 reasons for NOT sending your youngster to preschool. Whether a child attends public preschool or private, the long arm of the federal government has grabbed control of the curriculum and, in the process, lessened teacher autonomy. When it comes to early childhood education, we've silenced those who've spent a lifetime working with and studying young children. We've pushed common sense to the side and replaced it with fear— fear our children won't be smart enough, fear they won't succeed at school, fear they won't get good paying jobs. We've let these fears conquer us, preventing us from doing what's best for our youngest, most vulnerable learners.

Why do you think Americans want to speed up the developmental process?

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Questions & Answers

  • How do we prepare for kindergarten if our child does not attend Pre-K?

    You have the power to make learning fun and interesting for your child by tapping into her curiosities. Instead of enduring a month-long unit on dinosaurs or planets (for which she has no passion), you can focus on what intrigues her, whether it's dogs, cooking, making vehicles, or rainforests. She'll have plenty of time for a standard curriculum in the years ahead, but early childhood education needs to be individualized. All learning should stem from her interests in an organic way.

    Reading books about what interests her will make all the difference in the world. Good reading involves "scaffolding," finding out what she already knows on the topic and building from there. Unlike a preschool teacher with 20 kids, you can stop during reading and ask her questions, see if she's comprehending, and relate what you read to her own life experiences. That's so powerful compared to kids sitting criss-cross applesauce and zoning out while the teacher reads!

    Of course, real-world experiences are best for productive learning. Taking your child to the market introduces her to so much as she counts apples into a bag and weighs them on a scale. She can investigate the different varieties of apples, and you can make apple juice, apple pie, or caramel apples. The possibilities are endless.

    Preschool learning has become so narrow because parents want their kids prepared for kindergarten. This is truly tragic because preschool should be expanding their world and preparing them for life. There's no long-term advantage to the academic rigor we're imposing on young children. There are only negatives: less creativity, less critical thinking, and more depression, anxiety, and suicide.

    I hope that parents will see the folly in our country's preoccupation to prepare preschoolers for kindergarten. Research shows the early years should be about play, exploration, communication, and socialization, not workbooks, circle times, and teacher-directed lessons.

  • should i send my kid to preschool?

    While dwindling in numbers, there are still some good options for preschools that emphasize play, hands-on learning, and socialization. You want teachers and administrators with a background in early childhood education (not k-12) who understand what's developmentally appropriate for preschoolers. Many K-12 teachers only see preschool as a means to an end (i.e., preparing a child for kindergarten).

    You also want a preschool with a strong philosophy (Waldorf, Montessori, co-op) that guides instruction, discipline, nutrition, and play. A shared philosophy creates a community of like-minded parents who want a similar experience for their kids, are willing to work for it, and don't expect an education to be served up on a silver platter from teachers.

    My older son attended a wonderful co-op where moms and dads took turns volunteering in the classroom 2-3 times per month. We also participated in monthly parent meetings when the teacher educated us about child development and what to expect at each stage. The motto of the school was "together we're better." All of us parents were committed to giving the kids a fun and enriching preschool experience as a team.

    This sense of community is also found in many homeschooling groups where parents come together to share resources, take field trips, and meet for play dates. I'm also excited about the rise of "forest schools" in the US. They're popular in the UK and let kids spend the vast majority of time outside, enjoying the benefits of nature. This technology-free approach is about promoting healthy, well-rounded individuals for life, not just preparing them for kindergarten.

  • How does early education make children do poorly in school later in life?

    A preschool education hurts children at school (and in life) when the scope of instruction is too narrow and the goals too limiting. A good preschool is all about expanding the child's universe through play, hands-on learning, exploration, and socializing. A good preschool teacher wants her students to get energized about learning, knowing it comes from their own curiosity and is not spoon-fed to them by an adult.

    Unfortunately, play-based preschools are dwindling. Because of the academic rigor in the primary grades, parents want their kids prepared for kindergarten. This preparation includes writing in workbooks, sitting still for long teacher-directed lessons, learning letter names and sounds, and learning how to count and recognize numerals. There is no evidence that teaching these skills early has any long-term benefit. There is evidence, however, that it causes stress and turns kids off to school. We are seeing higher rates of depression and anxiety among children and the lack of play in early years is one likely culprit.

    Parents and teachers need to look at the big picture of education so kids will become life-long learners, knowing how to think critically, work cooperatively, and solve problems in creative ways. These are all more important than knowing that "t" makes the "tuh" sound.

  • How does preschool cause a child to have a bad attitude towards education later in life?

    Career experts agree that it's imperative for workers of the future see themselves as life-long learners; always acquiring new skills and new information as the world around them changes rapidly. Unlike our parents and grandparents, they won't be staying in the same job for fifty years and receiving a gold watch upon retirement. They'll move from job to job, learning to adapt and getting new training. Now, more than ever, it's important that children develop a love of learning at an early age, because they'll need to continue learning throughout their lives.

    Preschool should be an empowering experience for children as they construct their learning and let curiosity be their guide. If they feel helpless at school (sitting still as the teacher talks, writing in workbooks, learning about things that have little meaning to them such as numerals and letters), they'll develop a bad attitude about learning. They'll see it as something outside themselves--something to please adults.

    A preschool teacher with a background in early childhood education (not K-12 education) understands child development. She knows that preschoolers have just transitioned from parallel play to interactive play and need plenty of time to socialize with one another, practice their new-found verbal skills, and use their imaginations. She knows the preschool years are truly special, not just a time to prepare kids for kindergarten. She sees preschool as the time to prepare them for life and get them excited about all there is to learn and discover.

© 2015 McKenna Meyers

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    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 months ago from Bend, OR

      Tanu, I sent both my sons to preschool, but this was before the adoption of the Common Core standards and the current push for academic rigor in early childhood education. My older son attended a co-op that followed the tenants of the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC). It was phenomenal with lots of play, socializing, and exploration. It was all a preschool education should be.

      There are still preschools out there like that to be found, but they are dwindling in numbers. Parents are now picking preschools out of fear. They're worried that their child won't be ready for kindergarten if they choose a play-based one over an academic one. They hear other moms and dads talking about the high expectations for students entering kindergarten, and they don't want their youngster to be behind (which, of course, is quite understandable but not in the best interest of kids)!

      Although I wasn't a homeschooling parent, I know many parents who are. Their children are involved in numerous structured activities such as sports, acting, dance, and art and many unstructured ones as well. They belong to a homeschooling group that meets regularly in the park, at the library, and at one another's homes. Their children are not isolated in any way and have many opportunities to interact with people of all ages throughout the day.

    • profile image

      Tanu 

      2 months ago

      Hi, its nice you are homeschooling your child . But does it not affect your child ability to make friends and social skills ?

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      3 months ago from Bend, OR

      Cynthia, even though you aren't an educator, you just perfectly articulated what the Swiss psychologist, Jean Piaget, discovered about early learning. He found that children 2-7 are in the "preoperational stage" when they learn best by tapping into their unique interests and abilities and following their own curiosities. Unfortunately, this is not happening in most U.S. preschools where a one-size-fits-all approach is standard. Our obsession with preparing students for kindergarten has ruined preschool for so many.

      The real-world experiences on your farm are far more valuable than any classroom education. Your son is discovering what real learning is while building a strong, healthy body and an ability to handle new situations--all with a loving and attentive mom to encourage and guide him.

      Those who are "offended" with your decision are probably motivated by fear--fear that your son won't be ready for school. They're not considering the overall well-being of your boy. The lack of play in the early years has led to an increase in anxiety and depression among children. Yes, they can now read in kindergarten but so what? It doesn't result in any long-term benefit.

      Cynthia, your son is so fortunate to have you. Enjoy every minute with him and always trust your instincts as his mom. They're very good!

    • Cynthia Hoover profile image

      Cynthia Hoover 

      3 months ago from Newton, West Virginia

      I really enjoyed reading this so much! I decided not to send my son to Preschool and I was amazed by how offended others seemed to be by my decision to let my son stay at home a little longer before the years of academic learning start. My son will be 5 in August and start school this year, though I find that he is much more intellectual than anyone who scoffed at my decision to keep him home imagined he would be. I was met with so many reactions from people thinking that I was harming my child with my decision to skip Preschool. We have a 65 acre farm so we are surrounded by learning opportunities at every turn. I am amazed at how fast he has picked up tending to our animals and their needs. We hike all the time, and he is fascinated by the things we see and learns a great deal about nature, not something that usually takes place in a structured setting . Children are amazing, and I wish our educational system was more geared towards fostering the areas that an individual child excels or shows a natural desire or talent for rather than the vigorous focus on merely test scores. I am not an educator by any means but it seems to me that our educational system and curriculum are so standardized that it is as if we are attempting to make duplicates rather than individuals. At 2 years old my son was already showing an aptitude for mechanics and engineering and today he still continues to take things apart and be able to put them back together. Children learn so much more through discovery, had I freaked out and micromanaged my 2 year old he would have never completely dismantled and then re-built a lamp. I was in view at all times and it was not plugged in of course but I think there is more to a child having some freedom to discover early on that facilitates their intellect much more than starting rigorous structured learning only preparing them for the next evolution of classes to come. Again I am in no way an educator so I may be doing rather poorly at describing my views on the subject.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      4 months ago from Bend, OR

      Joanna, you're so right; it's become so political and bureaucratic. Scholars in early childhood education have been silenced and those with no experience are making the calls. They now want preschool teachers who believe their primary responsibility is to prepare kids for kindergarten. Sadly, many parents desire that as well because they don't want their child to be "behind" when starting elementary school. There's such a crazy push for academic rigor in the early years but not later.

      I do think we'll move back to play-based preschools but not any time soon. A woman from Canada wrote me recently, saying that's what happened in their country. So there is hope!

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      4 months ago from Bend, OR

      Kathryn, I think some well-informed parents of young children are starting their own mini-revolutions, choosing to homeschool their kids or send them to outdoor schools, forest schools, Montessori schools, Waldorf schools, and play-based co-ops. Now, parents who want their kids to play, create, and socialize at preschool are considered "fringe" while parents who want workbooks, teacher-directed lessons, and preparation for kindergarten are the norm.

      Our school district has opened some preschools, and they only want in-district teachers to apply. In other words, they only want K-12 teachers to get those jobs, not teachers with a background in early childhood development. They just want preschool to be preparation for kindergarten, and kindergarten for first grade, and so on. Too many parents are impressed with having a K-12 teacher as their child's preschool teacher when, in reality, they should want an early childhood educator.

      Kathryn, I love your passion and advocacy for young learners. It's a beautiful thing!

    • JoannaBlackburn profile image

      Joanna Blackburn 

      4 months ago from Inleside On The Bay, Texas

      I posted several months ago and have kept up with the comments on here. I'm glad to hear that so many believe as I do. I left teaching for many reasons. I was needed at home and when once again the rules changed and I came under fire for my belief on how children learn, I had no trouble deciding to walk away. I have my degree in Early Child Development. My state makes you do so many hours a year. The classes they had to offer me was a joke. All you had to do was show up and stay to the end to get your hours. I don't learn that way, so I took classes through Texas A&M, and to pass their test you have to use what you learn. But I was told those don't count. That I was not in compliance and was put under fire for it. But I still won't change. Children need to learn through play how to socialize with each other and that can't be done sitting down listening to a teacher all day. I love kids and miss it every day. So what I'm getting at is the system has gone to politics. A lot of teachers are there for nothing more than a paycheck. When I started teaching in 2000 things were a whole lot different. They expected you to care about the children and play with them. Not babysit or dictate them. But those ways are gone and I don't know if we can get it back. But we must keep trying for our children's sake.

    • profile image

      Kathryn L Hill 

      4 months ago

      I am printing this article now. Thank You!!!!! I asked a question in the forums: who will start the revolution in education? Man, do we need one! If we don't, the kids are going to SUFFER.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      4 months ago from Bend, OR

      You're welcome, LeAnna. I think a lot of moms and dads instinctively know preschool is not what it should be. So many talented and experienced preschool teachers have left the profession, refusing to push academic rigor on children who are too young for it. They're tired of championing play, hands-on learning, and socialization, only to be called "old-fashioned." Young teachers are disillusioned when they're told to do the opposite of what they've learned at college and in ECE classes. I think we'll turn it around and move back to play-based preschools, but it doesn't seem like it will happen any time soon.

    • profile image

      LeAnna 

      4 months ago

      Thank you for this!

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      4 months ago from Bend, OR

      Jessamyn, it sounds like you're on the right track. I love that your daughter is doing forest playgroup. I wish every town had that has an option! It's definitely becoming more popular as people realize the benefits of getting kids outdoors, moving and exploring.

      Good for you for speaking up at your school for age-appropriate learning. But, the board is doing what so many others are doing these days -- governing out of fear. It's a crazy place where at these days when we need to train/prepare kids for kindergarten. But we're here. It's what's happening. So is the increase in anxiety and depression about teens and children!

      You so impress me, Jessamyn. You see the insanity, but you're dealing with it and making the proper decisions for your daughter. We need more parents like you.

    • profile image

      Jessamyn 

      5 months ago

      Thanks so much for your response, McKenna! I agree that being sensitive is a gift. My daughter is the kindest person I know of and she has so much empathy and creativity! After talking to her pediatrician and her school we decided that delaying entry into kindergarten until she’s 6 is actually not that unreasonable or even rare in our town. Also, it is not uncommon for kindergarteners to have to repeat...jeez, I wonder why, given that it is a very competitive STEM school in an affluent town. Over the next year I will allow her unlimited learning through play, museums, forest playgroup and libraries! Her co-op preschool disappoints me more by the day. Unfortunately none of the parents on the board value age appropriate learning. Instead they are discussing harsher ways to discipline the kids who won’t sit still. :(. I failed to convince the board that perhaps expecting kids to sit still for 1 hour straight is the problem but I was shut down by the majority who feared that if their kids aren’t “trained” to endure this torture they won’t be ready for kindergarten. I’m glad the school year will be over soon. It’s sad what early childhood edu has come to, but your words give me hope that the pendulum will slowly start swinging back.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      5 months ago from Bend, OR

      First, Jessamyn, I commend you for wanting a play-based preschool for your daughter. Too many parents today desire just the opposite--a highly structured and academic program to prepare their child for kindergarten. These moms and dads are parenting out of fear because they know kindergarten is now what first and second grade once were with children being placed in reading groups according to their ability and even being expected to write paragraphs. Common sense has gone out the window.

      Like your daughter, my younger son went to a preschool that was touted as play-based but was really academic with handwriting books, long circle times, and learning stations. My older son attended a co-op preschool that was truly play-based with none of those things. When my older son was done at school, he was thoroughly exhausted and went home for a nap. My younger son, who had been sitting and listening far too much, was ready for play with his friends. So, when school ended at 11:30, I'd pick him up along with a few buddies and they'd come to my home and play for a few hours.

      It sounds like your daughter may benefit from that as well. I was amazed how in depth their imaginative play became. I longed for those days when I had such a vivid imagination and felt sad that kids don't have the time at preschool to tap into it. Plus, I'm familiar with all the studies that show how play is so extremely valuable to children's emotional and social development.

      Since your daughter is sensitive, school (and life) will probably be challenging for her at times. But, what a beautiful trait it is to have a tender heart! I totally understand and sympathize with your dilemma.

      It's just a nutty time in early education now, but the pendulum will swing back. In the meantime, your daughter is lucky to have you as her advocate. Just realize a lot of what schools expect of students in the early years is developmentally inappropriate and most experienced teachers know it. However, they must reluctantly go along with this accelerated learning if they want to keep their jobs and not get labeled "old-fashioned." Unfortunately, some of the best have left. I wish you and your daughter the very best!

    • profile image

      Jessamyn 

      5 months ago

      I agree with all that is written here, but as a parent of preschool aged girl I don’t know what to do with this information. My daughter is in part time preschool right now and we were under the impression that the preschool was play based, but from what I’ve observed it definitely not. There are only 4 months left so we’re not withdrawing her, but what then? She will be 4 months shy of 6 when kindergarten starts, but kindergarten in our town is full day only and very academic.

      My child is highly sensitive, I thought about holding her back a year but her preschool teacher said that would be unnecessary and unheard of to redshirt a child this old, however compulsory age is 7 here. Private schooling is not an option and I don’t have what it takes to homeschool. What would you do?

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      7 months ago from Bend, OR

      As the parent, Chris, you know your child best and want what's best for him. Trust your instincts. I think the most important aspect of preschool is for kids to get excited about learning, exploring, and playing. If that's not happening for your child, I'd say preschool is doing more harm than good. Your child's intellectual curiosity will serve him well throughout his lifetime and you don't want it to get stifled now. I wrote an article called "5 Reasons Why Circle Time Is a Waste of Time at Preschool." There is little benefit in it for the kids. It's more of a showcase for the teachers so they can perform and be center stage. Preschool is dangerous today because it's not seen as its own unique and separate entity. It's now seen as just a way to get kids ready for kindergarten. It sounds like your son would be better off learning at home, having regular play dates, doing activities at the library, and going to children's museums or attending a play-based co-op preschool. Preschools (and elementary schools) are expecting absurd things from little kids these days—behaviors that aren't developmentally appropriate. Then teachers are expected to communicate to parents that something is "wrong" with their child when, in truth, the child is perfectly normal. It's not normal for little kids (especially boys) to sit still for a boring Circle Time. They need to be active learners. It sounds like you have a smart kid on your hands and that will present some unique challenges for you with education. Fortunately, there are more options today and lots of resources online to personalize a program that fits your kid. Good luck!

    • profile image

      Chris 

      7 months ago

      I'm struggling with whether to keep my son in pre-k or not. He's very bright and curious and in the beginning loved to go to "school". The last two months he just doesn't want to go anymore. He absolutely hates circle time and doesn't pay attention to anything. He loves to read, loves numbers, anything to do with electricity, and just discovered the beating heart. ...the real heart. I feel pre-k is a complete mistake for him even though the teachers want to help him. They just don't know how. I'm wondering if the problem isn't him needing help, but they not understanding this lovely child.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      9 months ago from Bend, OR

      Sounds good, Sybol. I look forward to reading your thoughts.

    • sybol profile image

      sybol 

      9 months ago

      I am trying to find the words to express my thoughts. I have mixed feelings and yet I agree with the article and many of the comments. I am going to revisit later.

      Thank you for this article.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      11 months ago from Bend, OR

      You're my hero, Joanna! Keep fighting the good fight and advocating for what young children need. You're exactly right; teachers learn one thing in college and classes and then are expected to do the opposite in the real world. They're not making much money and then get told to do what they know is not good for kids. This creates an ethical dilemma for them with many leaving the profession. Thanks for including your thoughts and experiences!

    • JoannaBlackburn profile image

      Joanna Blackburn 

      11 months ago from Inleside On The Bay, Texas

      It's not just affecting preschool programs, it has had a severe effect on Child Development Centers too. The rules set by the governors and Department of Human Resources have not taken into account how children learn. They set rules for two-year-olds that are not what all of us have learned in any of the child care classes or college. I struggled daily to find a way to include their rules in my style of teaching. I believe children are active learners and must practice what they learn through hands on play. Most days the rules didn't always make it into my lesson plans, but I refused to change. I will not bring harm to these children who need a chance to spread their wings and be a child.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      That's a powerful story, Jennifer, and so fitting. Here in Oregon we have one of the biggest high school dropout rates in the country (in 2013 only 69% graduated), but you never hear about it. Instead, Oregon started all- day kindergarten, added pre-k at many schools, and offered more free preschool experiences. We keep adding more of the same, not making it better. We're just giving more and more sawdust to the horse!

    • profile image

      Jennifer Mugrage 

      2 years ago

      This reminds me of a story. A man thought he could train his horse to eat sawdust instead of oats, and so save some money. He began gradually to replace the horse's feed with higher and higher proportions of sawdust. Just around the time he had trained it to eat nothing but sawdust, the worthless animal up and died!

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      I so appreciate your comments, Kylyssa. You're so right. Now they even have reading groups -- based on ability -- in kindergarten so kids are already saying : "I'm in the top group" or "I'm in the bottom group." Parents are led to believe that there is a problem with their child if he's not reading in kindergarten, if he needs to move around, if he can't sit still for long periods. There's little acceptance for the truth that youngsters develop at different times and different rates. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughtful comments!

    • Kylyssa profile image

      Kylyssa Shay 

      2 years ago from Overlooking a meadow near Grand Rapids, Michigan, USA

      You mentioned that other countries that do not follow the same types of programs see better results. There's a reason for both major elements of that assertion; most other countries have completely different end goals compared to the US.

      The end goal for education in most other countries is to produce happy people who are good citizens because they understand that such people are far more productive, better educated, healthier, and far, far less prone to commit crimes. Until the US culture comes to accept those truths, it's doubtful progress can be made. The US must come to view children as cherished people, rather than as a consumable resource to fuel capitalism.

      The end goal for US education is to train people to fit into capitalism as practiced in our culture. Children are taught to sit still for long hours while doing repetitive, boring, frustrating, and often pointless tasks in very specific ways and without questioning authority. In higher grades, children are even taught to do work far, far below their capabilities for hours on end to hone their ability to do what they are told without complaint and at speed even if it's stupid, boring, and pointless.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      Kathryn -- I love your passion for early childhood education and your respect for the stages of development. It's so sad that some people want kids rushed through these important stages instead of celebrating them.

      Mercedes -- Your comments are echoed in the excellent documentary, "Race to Nowhere," about the incredible pressures students are facing today. I have a son in high school and I try my best to get him to focus on learning, not grades, but it's nearly impossible. I see young people who worked so hard to get into college, graduated with a degree, and now are working at Starbucks or some other job unrelated to their field. But, most definitely, the solution to this is NOT to burden our young children with accelerated learning and unrealistic expectations. Thanks for reading and good luck in your future!

    • Mercedesmedlin profile image

      Mercedesmedlin 

      2 years ago

      I completely agree. My mom is a first grade teacher at the elementary school I went to and back then ( about 12 years ago) we never had to do any kind of standard testing stuff. Now, they are required to and I see kindergarteners already learning how to write. It's insane how much pressure is put on kids today, including myself. It's mentally draining. I'm a senior in high school and besides all the standardized testing I had to do in previous years, now I have to apply for college. But in order to get into a "good" college you have to have high academic success, a good score on your SAT/ACT, be involved in clubs/sports, and now they have raised the standards because maybe a college that had only required 3 years of math in high school now requires 4. College is also very expensive. There are so many stressed out kids, and some that will even cry if they get a B because now a days B's are just the average. There are some kids out there that even go as far as committing suicide because they can't take it anymore. The education system definitely needs a change!

    • Kathryn L Hill profile image

      Kathryn L Hill 

      2 years ago from LA

      The child is in a second embryonic state from 0 to 6 years. It is a long period of formation and includes universal stages of development. All children go through these stages and need to go through them as a butterfly needs to develop according to nature within it's cocoon. We need to know on a conscious level what is taking place. For one thing it is nature at work. we do not tell the feet in the womb how many toes to grow. We need to respect the process of nature within each child as it forms his psyche / the foundation of the operation of the mind.

      And here is the key:

      The psyche is forming itself based on what it absorbs in its environment.

      It must freely absorb through the senses while interacting with the environment.

      There is also the aspect of the sense of order / reality which becomes indelible. Whatever the child absorbs into his psyche via the mind and brain it becomes permanent.

      This powerful ability to absorb can be utilized for positive benefit by creating a conducive environment. But The child ABSOLUTELY needs freedom within it. Boundaries help to create the freedom. This is the basis for the Montessori method.

      Secret of Childhood

      The Absorbent Mind

      Both books by Maria Montessori, a Doctor of Italy in the early 1900's. She saw children in the light of a doctor and scientist and has helped many with her schools she established. She and others light the true way and must be researched by parents and teachers of today to stay and create the appropriate track for our babies, toddlers and preschoolers.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      Yes, you're probably right. I see a future where babies are born and immediately placed in "school." They'll be assessed for crawling, crying, and spitting up. Of course, it will all get documented in triplicate. Parents will send their babies to tutors if they're below the mark in any of their skills. The babies will have full access to technology. They'll be told what to think and believe. If they don't conform, they'll be given drugs to keep them in line.

    • RTalloni profile image

      RTalloni 

      2 years ago from the short journey

      Thanks for this discussion. It's important to highlight the topic and you've done a straightforward job of it. The government's intrusion into the educational system is more about control than anything to do with helping children grow and learn. A hub could be written about why the government does not want children to "learn how to learn" but the author would likely be called a conspiracy theorist. :)

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      Yes, adults are easily impressed when their kids are given technology at school. One mom said to me recently in regards to I-pads at school: "The earlier, the better!" I don't know where parents are getting this misinformation -- surely not from scholars in early learning! Perhaps, the tech companies , who profit from tech at schools, are spreading these untruths. Any way, little children are suffering because of it with poor gross and fine motor skills, limited social skills and vocabularies, and more obesity. Thanks for reading and sharing your experience!

    • Kathryn L Hill profile image

      Kathryn L Hill 

      2 years ago from LA

      OMG!!!

      Many may not believe all you write, " … too much standardized testing, rote learning, and technology…" for preschoolers! But, I have seen it first hand: In public before / after school (pre-school) day cares where I often sub as head teacher, I say, "These children should not be allowed so much computer time!" the aides look at me like I am out of my mind.

    • letstalkabouteduc profile imageAUTHOR

      McKenna Meyers 

      2 years ago from Bend, OR

      I know! That's why I'm not teaching now. To teach preschool and kindergarten these days, you must remain woefully ignorant of developmentally appropriate practices, common sense, and what's happening in politics.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      What you are suggesting, of course, goes against traditional thinking and training...exactly what this country needs. :)

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