10 Things I Learned While Growing up in a Broken Home

Updated on May 28, 2018
Ashley Marie Rile profile image

With a desire to help and inspire people around the world—Ashley currently blogs about life, psychology, purpose, spirituality, and more!


Growing up in a broken home can be a difficult experience to go through in life, especially if you are forced to at a young age. Those that have grown up in a broken home understand the difficulties and everyday challenges that you have faced in the past. Although toxic environments aren't easy to be around, there are also important lessons to be learned from it. Here I will share with you the ten lessons that I have learned personally from growing up in a broken home:

1. Vulnerability

When you come from a broken home, you can understand the vulnerability in which you saw weakness in your family that you never wanted to see in the first place. From the constant fighting, screaming, and door slamming, you've witnessed broken hearts from a young age. It's almost like you were forced to grow up and be the strong one in the family and you were there so much for others that you were never there for yourself.

2. "Home"

People that have grown up in a broken home understand the feeling of never wanting to go home. We find the comfort of home in other places, so we try our hardest to stall going home as much as possible. Running away is the closest thing to us that feels like home.

3. Compassion

If anyone knows pain, it's us. We know what it's like to hurt so when we come across other's that are hurting, we do our best to be there for them. We show the empathetic side of ourselves because when we were at home hurting, we wanted the people that weren't for us which makes us give out the thing's that we've always wanted, but weren't able to have.


4. Love

When you grow up in a broken home, you can understand the feeling of wanting to be loved. It's something that you will always want in life because it's something that you didn't have growing up. You tend to have a big heart for people, and continuously wish that you could have the same love in return. Even if you don't receive the same love from others, you still go out of your way to give because you understand what it feels like to not feel real love, and you don't want anyone else to ever have to feel the same.

5. Emotions

Many people will unintentionally bottle-up their emotions. We tend to guard our emotions, simply because of the fear that we have. We fear that the emotions that we have, will be used against us later on, which leads us to remain quiet about how we truly feel. We have a difficult time expressing our emotions because anytime that we have, it has been at the wrong times.

6. People

When you grow up in a toxic environment, you are already aware of the different traits of a toxic person. This is why we have the abilities to differentiate those who are a threat to our lives and those who are not. It is also why we distance ourselves from other people because we have already gone through intense chaos at home, and don't want to relive the pain.


7. Overprotection

Some of us have had to protect our siblings, or even our own parent's from physical and emotional pain. If you had to act as a protector at a young age, of course you will carry the same trait with you as you get older. It is completely normal and the reason behind it is because we sense that we NEED to act as the protector to those that mean the most too us.

8. Bullies

We become our own bullies because it felt like anything that we did, wasn't good enough for anyone. It always feels like there is something wrong with us. It becomes so persistent that over time, we begin to become our own self-critic. We become so self-aware so that others can't.

9. Tension

When you grow up in a toxic home, you begin to resent the tension. Tension for us is almost like a ticking time bomb and we do everything we can to try to avoid it. We would rather communicate and try to resolve problems before they manifest. That is why you will find yourself wanting to run out the door when you are in an argument with someone and is your first instant reaction.

10. Success

As we get older, life assures us that things will get better and that we as humans matter. We have this inner desire of wanting to succeed in life because we want to have a better future rather than dwelling on the past. We want to succeed so that one day we can have a family of our very own and give them the life we never had as children.


This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

Questions & Answers

    © 2018 Ashley Marie Riley


      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment
      • profile image


        3 months ago

        This was honestly the most relatable thing ever :( everytime someone says your too sensitive or empathetic but they just don’t know the reason behind it

      • peachpurple profile image


        2 years ago from Home Sweet Home

        Sorry to hear about your family. It is hard and difficult but I am sure you will learn to accept a new life as you walk ahead


      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, wehavekids.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://maven.io/company/pages/privacy

      Show Details
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
      ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)