50+ Things to Say When People Ask "Why Don't You Want Kids?"

Updated on May 14, 2019
Layne Holmes profile image

Layne is a writer. She enjoys staying current on trends, media, and emerging topics.

"You Don't Want Kids?" What to Say to Get People to Stop Asking.
"You Don't Want Kids?" What to Say to Get People to Stop Asking. | Source

Why Aren't You Having Kids? What to Say

Times they are changing. Nowadays and more than ever, women have careers, desires, ambitions, and achievements to go after. Having children in your 30s, mid-30s, and later simply isn't for everyone. Women get a lot of pressure to procreate. Some believe it's our duty.

While birth and being a mother is great for many women, it's not for every woman. This is especially true for women who have made their mind up that they do not want kids. So, what do you say when people ask? How do you shut the situation down? How do you get people to understand?

Funny responses.
Funny responses. | Source

What to Tell People: Funny Responses

  • I have 1, 2, 3, or 4+ furry kids at home.
  • My ovaries are retired.
  • I have a hard enough time looking after myself.
  • We decided we're going to go after that "hashtag" van life and there's only room for two.
  • We're waiting to win the lottery.
  • I have a really difficult time with high-pitch noises.
  • I'm super competitive and get reactive over board games.
  • I did a lot of babysitting for friends throughout the years and that was enough for me.
  • Puppets scare me.
  • I'm really fond of sleeping in, drinking wine without reservation, and watching sexy films.
  • I'm such a neat freak. I can't even handle cleaning up after myself.
  • I never liked Teletubbies, Barney, and Big Bird scares me.
  • I had a cactus and I killed it. My psychiatrist told me that's a warning sign that I may not be ready for more responsability.
  • I curse like a sailor.
  • I make a horrible designated driver and I heard Uber and Lyft isn't fond of transporting kids.
  • One of my cats is really aggressive.
  • I'm afraid of baby dolls. Like really afraid. Have you ever seen Chucky?
  • I'm really worried about the environment and diapers just don't seem all that green.
  • I rent my nephew every other summer when my sister needs a break from life.
  • I'm pretty convinced of David Attenborough's world collapse prediction.
  • I'd be the most embarrassing parent . . . my childhood was awkward enough.
  • My migraines trigger easily.
  • I'm allergic to chaos.
  • I have enough regrets in my life!
  • I'm big on dooms day prepping and kids don't fit into that equation.
  • Hatters gonna hate.
  • I was banned from playing tag as a kid because I got too enthusiastic.
  • I'm terribly afraid of small things that move fast.
  • My hearing is incredibly sensitive.
  • I'm trying to move away from my stretchy pants dependency.
  • I'm fond of return policies and renting—otherwise, I get nervous.

Nobody asks a guy that.

— Zoey Deschanel
Serious responses.
Serious responses. | Source

What to Tell People: Serious Responses

  • I simply love my life.
  • I feel complete.
  • I feel fulfilled in every aspect of my life currently.
  • I'm an independent being. I love kids, but I love myself more than possibility.
  • I enjoy deciding in favor of what would most enrich my life.
  • I've never felt the urge.
  • My partner and I are active human beings. We feel very fulfilled.
  • We love our pets—we feel like they're our children.
  • I love my nieces and nephews, and I figure I can care for them when my sister or brother needs a mini vacay.
  • I've definitely considered adoption—there are so many children in need of good homes in this world.
  • I like being a great aunt.
  • I like being a great uncle.
  • We are focusing on our relationship and what brings us joy.
  • I've never seen myself as a parent.
  • Interesting question. I just don't.
  • I'm just not interested.
  • I'm considering having a tubal ligation procedure for health reasons.
  • I have health conditions that make it too risky for me.

Childhood was heartbreaking enough.

— Chelsea Handler
If you fulfilled, you need not give any explanation.
If you fulfilled, you need not give any explanation. | Source

10 Reasons People Don't Have Kids

What are the top reasons people don't have kids? According to a study hosted on Politifact.com:

  1. Childcare is too expensive.
  2. I need time for the kids I have.
  3. We're worried about the shape of the economy.
  4. We can't afford it.
  5. Financial instability.
  6. Want more leisure time.
  7. No access to paid family leave.
  8. Limited paid family leave.
  9. Worried about the state of the world.
  10. Can't balance work and personal life.

Remember: Your Life Is Yours to Live

Children or no children—remember that you don't have to fully commit to a certain answer or way of being. You can always change your mind in either direction. You also don't have to explain yourself to anyone. This is your life to live, and if you have a partner and you've made this decision, that's your right. It's also not anybody else's business to pry through, dig through, and persuade. You do you!

An Exploration "Why I Don't Want Kids"

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    © 2019 Layne Holmes

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