Alyssa is a wife, mom, and coffee enthusiast who loves sharing her favorite lifestyle tips with the world.
Being a stay at home mom can be incredibly rewarding. Spending time with your children, taking care of them, and being present for all of the milestones is important as a parent. You will certainly save money on childcare and not have to worry about leaving your children with a stranger. In this day and age, with all of the horror stories, it’s hard to entrust your children’s well being to a daycare facility. As a working parent, you are often plagued with guilt, feeling as though you are missing those important times in your children’s lives or just not having enough time to spend with them. While staying at home with your children can be pretty amazing, it is not always an easy occupation and presents quite a few challenges.
For many years, society has waged a war between working moms and stay at home moms. Each is judged harshly and made to feel like they are not enough. As a stay at home mom, it often feels as though many people look down on you. They may view you as lazy. Where is your ambition? What about your career? What do you do all day? Are you ever going to go back to work? These are the questions people ask. It can be difficult to face these judgments. They can weigh on you; make you question yourself, and your decision to stay at home. It’s easier said than done, but you have to ignore the people who constantly make you feel terrible. Know that you’ve made the best decision for your family. That is really all that matters.
Oftentimes staying at home means your family now only has one income. Budgeting is essential, but there will be sacrifices that you have to make. Your priorities will really shift. Making what you have last will be important. You may not always be able to purchase new clothes, new shoes, or make up. Sometimes even simple, everyday things like shampoo and conditioner will seem like luxuries. You may have to switch your brands to something less expensive. If you enjoy trips to the salon, you might begin to look at doing some of those things on your own to save money. Using coupons helps. Grocery shopping at stores like Aldi is also a great way to save money. Eat at home instead of going out to a restaurant. Opting out of cable and switching to a streaming service like Netflix also saves money. Cut the cost completely by using an antenna for local channels instead. You may also want to look at ways you can save on your utility bills. It can be a struggle, but it is doable.
Staying Motivated and Finding a Balance
There will come a time when the housework seems endless, the children are getting on your nerves, and you have maxed out all of your patience. It may get to a point where you just feel like giving up. What is the point? As soon as you get all of the laundry done, you turn around and there’s more to do. You dust, vacuum, and mop; three hours later it doesn’t look like you’ve done a thing. Between taking care of the kids and keeping the house clean, it doesn’t feel like you ever have a moment for yourself. Staying motivated and finding a balance for everything going on in your life can be a struggle when you are always home, looking at the same four walls.
The trick is to find something you love, and make the time. That could mean getting up a little earlier to enjoy a cup of hot coffee in silence or staying up a little later to read a book or magazine. Having your kids chip in around the house can also be helpful and will teach them about teamwork and responsibility.
Bohemian Momsody - Bohemian Rhapsody Parody from MyLifeSuckers
Keeping the Spark in Your Relationship
When you are cleaning up messes all day and taking care of the kids, romance may be the furthest thing from your mind. It’s hard to feel sexy and feminine in old baggy clothes covered in snot, sweat, and dirt. You might be tired or just not in the mood. That is life. It happens. But sometimes it is nice to put forth a little effort. Put on some makeup. Do your hair. Put on that sexy dress that hangs in the back of your closet and surprise your husband with a special dinner when he gets home. He will notice the time you took and will appreciate it. Most importantly, it will make you feel good. Date nights might be a thing of the past, but you can certainly find simple, easy, inexpensive ways to spend time together. Put the kids to bed and watch a movie or your favorite TV show together. Sit up and just chat over a glass of wine, coffee, or soda. Play a game together. Be creative and have fun.
While there are many challenges stay at home moms face, the struggles, sacrifices, and difficulties are well worth it. Be patient with yourself. Having confidence in your decision, a sense of humor, and a supportive spouse make staying at home a little easier. Find a little time for yourself and put forth effort in your relationship. Most importantly, remember to have fun.
Sia "Cheap Thrills" Parody - No Social Skills from MyLifeSuckers
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2016 Alyssa
Alyssa (author) from Ohio on October 05, 2016:
Thank you! It is definitely tough at times to be a stay at home mom. That you were able to do it for ten years is amazing! I do worry about the challenges that I may face when it is time to go back to work. My son actually attends an online public school, which presents its own challenges. A hub for another day perhaps. But we stay busy and have a lot fun. :)
Catherine Tally from Los Angeles on October 05, 2016:
Hats off to stay at home moms! My daughter is in college now, but I stayed home with her for 10 years. It was hard work to say the least, and I was very involved in Girl Scouts as a troop leader and product chair for our service unit. I also made a line of wearable art jewelry and had an elderly mom who needed help . The drawbacks you've written about are spot on! I had one working mom refuse to let her daughter come play because I was a bad role model! I am thankful that I was able to do it, but it did put me behind when I was ready to return to work in my mid 50s. Enjoy the time with your kids:)
Alyssa (author) from Ohio on October 05, 2016:
Thank you! Sounds like you have an exciting, but bittersweet time ahead. :)
Amy from East Coast on October 05, 2016:
Great Hub. I am a stay at home mom. My youngest is starting school next year and I will be venturing back out to the workforce. Being a stay at home mom for eight years is something that I will never look back on and regret. Lots of luck!