How does abuse fit in if the girl's father is an abuser? Should that daughter still be pushed to have a relationship with her father?


No girl should be pushed to have a relationship with a father who's abusive. A mother should do everything in her power to protect her child from physical, psychological, and/or verbal mistreatment. This may involve working within the legal system to safeguard her child. In other instances, it may involve releasing the father from child support payments in exchange for staying out of her life.

While some moms try to shelter their daughters from any harsh realities regarding their dads, this is a mistake. Without a proper (and age-appropriate) explanation for why her father is out of the picture, a girl typically blames herself. She thinks that she's unworthy and unlovable. If her dad is abusive, she needs to know the truth and understand that his behavior has nothing to do with her and everything to do with him.

Moreover, if a daughter has an absent, abusive father, her mother should make certain that there are good, solid men in her life: a devoted grandfather, uncle, or family friend who's committed to remaining a central part of her life. Unfortunately, some moms cycle boyfriends through the home, wrongly believing that they serve as positive father substitutes for their daughters. This is rarely the case.

A live-in boyfriend takes up the mom's time and attention, making the girl feel less important and less secure. When he eventually leaves, she feels less hopeful about growing up, falling in love, and having a committed relationship. According to the organization, “Darkness to Light,” children who live in homes with live-in partners are at a much higher risk for sexual abuse. They're 20 times more likely to be victims than children living with both biological parents.

You may want to read my article entitled: “5 Reasons Parental Verbal Abuse Is Far More Damaging Than We Thought.” According to the latest findings in neuroscience, name-calling can change a youngster's brain structure. This, in turn, can lead to anxiety, depression, hostility, drug abuse, learning deficits, and behavioral problems. Therefore, verbal abuse has the potential to be just as harmful as other forms of mistreatment.

Updated on February 15, 2020

Original Article:

Fatherless Daughters: How Growing Up Without a Dad Affects Women
By McKenna Meyers

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