I am now 66 years old. My dad died 5 days after my 7th birthday. Not until I was an older adult and someone actually said to me that losing my dad so young had to affect me. Hm, I had never really thought about that. My mom did such a great job raising us, that I never thought life should have been any different. I have been married twice and had 3 or so unsuccessful relationships. Right now struggling to make ends meet, how did this affect me? What can I do? I am the last one left.


I'm sorry you're struggling financially. It sounds, though, that you've lived a full life and have escaped many of the pitfalls of being a fatherless daughter. Studies show that daughters with dads who died are actually better off psychologically than those whose dads abandoned them. This is because they didn't experience that heartbreaking early rejection. They often don't have that hole in their hearts that they try to fill it up with food, alcohol, drugs, and sex.

It sounds like your mother did a wonderful job of making you feel secure, loved, and wanted, and you were truly blessed because of that. I wonder if something else—something more recent—is the real cause of your current despair. Has something happened lately that made you think of your childhood without a dad? Are concerns about your own mortality causing you to turn to the past rather than look ahead to a future that, in your mind, seems rather bleak? Because of your money concerns, are you yearning for the archetypal father who's strong and powerful and protects his kids from all harm?

Writing in a journal would be a fantastic way for you to explore why these thoughts and feelings are coming to the surface now. It can also be a wonderful tool for brainstorming ideas on how to make your present situation more hopeful, financially and otherwise. Talking about your situation with family and friends is another terrific way to get unstuck and open up your mind to fresh solutions.

As a fatherless daughter, you have shown incredible resilience in life. Give yourself permission now to be curious about yourself, the path you've chosen, and how you want to spend your remaining years.

Updated on June 13, 2019

Original Article:

Fatherless Daughters: How Growing Up Without a Dad Affects Women
By McKenna Meyers

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