In your case confidence is key. Be kind, but hold your head high. Take her suggestions when you can, but never look like a sad puppy. If you are confident and kindly defend your reasons (i.e. “Yes, Sally, I ordered the fish and chips again because it’s my favorite dish. Want to try some?”) you will show her that you are your own person. With time and consistency, she will see that she cannot change or control you. One time my MIL went through a critical stage and we had a little argument. I ended up saying, “I’m really sorry that I am just NOT the way you want me to be. But I am me! Warts and all!” She realized at that moment what she had been doing. It was an awkward and hard conversation that you may need to have if the consistent confidence does not pay off. Also, consider getting your boyfriend on board!