If your father thinks you're a joke, doesn't take care of all his children, and comes in and out of your life, how can you overcome that?

Answer

You're already overcoming it by being aware of your father's weaknesses and wanting to do better. Forgive your dad for his failings and learn from them. Sometimes our greatest teachers are those folks who've messed up their lives and serve as an example of what we don't want to do.

At this very moment, make a conscious decision to stop blaming your father and take responsibility for your life. Once you do that, you'll feel empowered and less likely to become a victim of depression and anxiety. Those typically come about when we don't take control of our lives. If you don't do this now, you could wind up like so many of us fatherless daughters, myself included, who blamed our dads for everything that went wrong in our lives, even long after their deaths!

Wake up every morning and ask yourself this crucial question: Do I choose love today or do I choose fear? Fear is what limits so many of us fatherless daughters—fear of being hurt again, fear of rejection, fear of being unlovable, fear of not being enough. Fear can creep into every aspect of our lives: romantic relationships, career, friendships, and casual everyday interactions. Become aware of how fear holds you back and fight it with every fiber of your being.

Every experience in our lives takes us where we need to go. What did you learn from your dad that can propel you forward into a more meaningful and joyous life? How can you become a better person because of it? How can you have deeper relationships?

Researchers have found that one of the most powerful weapons in our arsenal to get over anger and hurt is gratitude. The spiritual teacher, Iyanla Vanzant, says: “What you focus on, grows!” Therefore, take the spotlight off your dad and shine it on the people and things for which you are thankful: your mom, your siblings, your grandparents, your friends, your pets, music, nature, books, or whatever brings you happiness. Don't become a prisoner of your negative thoughts because they keep you from embracing life itself.

Take steps every day to live in the moment, be positive, and practice gratitude. You're on your way!

Updated on August 26, 2019

Original Article:

Fatherless Daughters: How Growing Up Without a Dad Affects Women
By McKenna Meyers
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